"There will be popcorn... and small dogs..." - Georgia

 

"Please do not throw toilet paper across the stage...  thank you..." - Jonathan Smith

 

"I made one out of crayon... does that count?" - Michael

 

"And then you'd have your own midget concubine." - Szot

 

"Dude, smell it right there." -Ben

 

"Christ, Ben!  Just because he doesn't say that there's a huge fountain squirting blood in the middle of the room doesn't mean there is one!" -Moose

 

"If you ever fall off the Empire State Building, go real limp like a dummy and someone might catch you - 'cause hey, free dummy..." -Jack Handy

 

"Sacar la Basura" -Unknown (Spanish translation for those who do not speak Spanish : "To dry the refuse".  We don't get it either...)

 

"If you're ever walking beside a lava flow and you drop your keys in it - forget 'em, man, they're gone." -Jack Handy

 

"Art history hurts my feelings :(" -Unknown

 

"Becky say:

Confusion is a warm and fuzzy place!  You might as well get used to it!" -Becky

 

"But I don't want math in my underwear!" -Moose

 

"1. Eat mangoes naked - lick the juice off your arms.

2. 'Sunbathe' in the moonlight - naked.

3. Introduce yourself as marvelous.

4. Laugh with children.

5. Yell, 'I'm succulent!  I'm here!  I'm loud!'

6. Inspect your parking places with a flashlight.

7. Be delicious."

-Unknown

 

"Piratey things:  Kay's guide to be a pirate:

1. Say 'arrrrgh' a whole lot.

2. Speak in a broken cockney accent.

3. Demand ale from your waitress - be sure to call her 'wench'.

4. Have a parrot sit on your shoulder.

5. Wear an eye patch.

6. Don't bathe.

7. Cut off your leg, replace it with a piece of old nasty wood.

8. See above statement - apply to hand - replace hand with hook." -Kay

 

**Added to above ^ later by unknown author...

"Also: Work trite 'piratey' sexual innuendos into your rants or whatever.

Ex: 1.  Walk MY plank!

      2.  Batten down MY hatches!

And as always, start with 'Arrgh' and end with 'wench' or an allusion to a great sea beast." -Unknown

 

"If I was an Ethiopian medicine man, I'd think my name would be Skippy-Lou-Bungo." -Unknown

 

"If God is Love

    And Love is Blind

Then Ray Charles

    Must be God." -Unknown

 

" 'Music is a higher revelation than philosophy.' -Ludwig Van Beethoven"

-Unknown, but I have the feeling it was the infamous Brad Oxnam

 

"Support DSU theatre!!!" -Unknown

 

" 'No, no, no, no...' -The Boys Next Door, Clara" -Unknown

 

"When life gives you lemons, throw them at someone :)." -Unknown

 

"This life is moving into a black pit of nothingness through the guidance of treeman!  Maybe Hell has coffee..." -Emma

 

"Slagmonkeys are intriguing!" -Jo Anne

 

"A good way to threaten somebody is to get a stick of dynamite and light the fuse.  Then you call the guy and hold the fuse to the phone.  'Hear that?' you say, 'That's dynamite, baby!' " -Jack Handy

 

" 'You can't fight in here, this is a WAR ROOM!!!' -Dr. Strangelove (or how i learned to stop worrying and love the bomb)" -Probably Brad Oxnam

 

" 'If it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.' -Lewis Black (warning - don't think about this statement too much or you may have an anyrism)" -Again probably Brad Oxnam

 

"Batman!" -Unknown

 

" 'I don't drink... coffee.' -Dracula 2000" -Brad Oxnam

 

" 'You remind me of the babe...'

  'Babe?  What babe?'

  'The babe with the Power.'

  'Power?  What Power?'

  'Power of Voodo.'

  'Who do?'

  'You do!'

'Remind me of the babe...' " -Unknown

 

"Get the German out of my head!" -Moose

 

" 'YAY!!! WE'RE DOOMED!!!' -GIR, Invader Zim" -Unknown

 

"He who dies with the most toys is... dead. -Stanbot 5000" -Unknown

 

" 'Why was there BACON IN THE SOAP!?!'

  'I made it myself...'

-Invader Zim and GIR" -Brad Oxnam

 

"Move out of our country if you don't like it!

BE A SUPPORTIVE AMERICAN OR GET THE HECK OUT!" -Unknown

 

"Falling coconuts kill more people than sharks do - roughly 150 vs. 10 each year.  We're still working on the death-by-papaya statistic..." -February issue of Jane

 

"But I don't want math in my underwear!" -Moose

 

"Yeah, it was Siamese-twin mosquitoes, not a spider, but they have to fly around together and bite the same people..." -Me

 

"Well, okay, but when the world ends and it's all your fault, I'm gonna say, 'Hey - I tried to stop her...'!" -Michael M.

 

"I said 'I'm poor and I only have ten dollars,' but they thought I said 'I'm a whore and I only charge ten dollars'..." -Katy

 

"Hey!  No summoning in the band hall - especially not next to the tubas!" -Me

 

"Here's your sex toy... I mean... flute..." -Lemon to me

 

"Highschool.  It's not that great.  Zits.  Dandruff.  Mortality." -Harmony, Angel

 

"That goes on the website..." -Me and Lemon

 

"I see you baby, shakin' that thing..."

"OMG what IS that thing she's shakin'?!?!" -Me and Michael M.

 

"Well, SORRY, if we're a little paranoid, after the ****ing DINOSAUR came trampsing down Main Street!" -Ben

 

"They can't find me?  Can I find me?" -Me

 

"I said bulbous veggie fruits"
"And you were a lion?" -Michael M. and Daniel, respectively

 

"Nothing says five-star like khaki..." - Nate

 

"Roll a d4 and see what I'm thinking!" - Matthew

 

"Szot!  You lost my chicken to The Abyss!" - Me

 

"I got the Tootsie Roll." - Szot

 

"Grab a bag of chips, bowl of nuts, watch somebody burn!  Y'know!" - Alan J.

 

"Heaven in Europe is when the policemen are English, the cooks are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian, and everything is organized by the Swiss.

Hell in Europe is when the cooks are English, the mechanics are French, the policemen are German, the lovers are Swiss, and everything is organized by the Italians." - one of 'Road Runner's' Rants of Rambling  (I love being Italian :P )

 

"Beat him with his own shoe!" (Cameron)

"Yes!  Beat him with his own shoe!" (Troy and Trey, in unison)

"AHGHH!"  (Szot, being beaten with his own shoe)

"Beat him with MY shoe!" (Cameron)

"Yes!  Beat him with YOUR shoe!" (Troy and Trey, in unison)

"Arrrrghhh!" (Szot, being beaten with CAMERON'S shoe)

"BEAT HIM WITH THE MANGA!!!" (Cameron, getting a little carried away)

"NO!!!!  DON'T BEAT HIM WITH THE MANGA!!!!" (Troy and Trey, in panicked unison)

"Perfect love is rare indeed - for to be a lover will require that you
continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the
child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the
philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the
scholar and the fortitude of the certain." - Leo Buscaglia

 

"It's like, my body's all sweaty and my mouth is all dry..."

"Yeah... if I could lick myself maybe I wouldn't be so FREAKING dehydrated..." - Allyn and I, band

 

"You must >LIIIIIVE< for the peace sign... LIIIIIIIIIVE FOR IT!" - Me

 

"We carry big chunks of wood and 6-ft poles.  We're very good at what we do... ;) " - Allyn

 

"And, lo, behold mine hempen necklace!" - Szot (who else, but our beloved Szot?)

 

"MONAAAYYYYYYY!!!!!!! Monay monay!" - Me, Alan, and Sam

 

"See, you guys are the reason for the season for us, you know?  You're the reason we wake up in the morning, and you're the reason... we F*** S*** UP AT NIGHT!" - Josey Scott, lead singer of Saliva

 

"We should put all the preps in a box and shake it up, and then nuke it..."

....
"Yeah, you could disguise it as the Gap..."
~laughter~ - Lemon and Sam, respectively

 

"Don't mess with me - my hunk of wood is bigger than yours..." - me (on the rifle line) to Sam (on the percussion line)

 

"No!  Save it until we're on Ecstacy..." - Szot